(I like to add pictures to add to the post)
said to me that maybe going with the safe option in love is the best deal. She brought up a guy she used to hang out with and said maybe she should've stayed with him. I couldn't remember this guy, but I asked her if this was the guy who she kissed and felt nothing with? She reminded me that yes, he was, and said "I felt like I was kissing my brother". I then asked her "Why would you bring him up"? She told me that the guys that she does feel a spark with are usually the douche bags and act like little boys that keep her on her toes, but treat her badly. She reminded me that although those are not the ideal type of men you want in your life, it is what keeps her entertained. I gave her my take on the situation but as I always say, what do I really know? I am a single gal, but come on, what are we supposed to do? Wait around until you figure it out?
Now as a woman, I know how true this is. Usually we love.....well maybe that's a strong word... usually we like those boys that just don't fit with what we want or what we are looking for. They might be a little cuter than your average Joe, but I have realized that the older I get, the more I want to find a man, not a boy, that is going to love me with all my crazy ways and will have my best interest at heart.
As I look back at all my "great loves" I laugh a little, because at one time I thought they were "the one" that if I didn't end up with, I would die, I mean die!! Clearly that did not happen because I am still here alive and breathing. I have learned that there is a reason for everything. Let me explain by running down my list of boyfriends/friends with benefits/etc in no particular order with fake names of course to protect the innocent and not so innocent. Not that they read this, but you never know:
Sal: Broke my heart to the point where I thought I would never come back from it. Three years later, after we had become are friends and I find out he is gay (see what I mean... things happen for a reason).
This is not Sal and his partner but they are just as cute as this couple...hee hee.
Jeremy: High School boyfriend, did I really believe it was going to work out? I mean come on we were both in high school...lol.
Mike: Crazy! I mean crazy! Would show up at my house because he "missed me". Cute at first and then I realized he was way too needy.
Ryan: College friend with benefits....uhmm never a good way to start anything. Hard to be with someone who doesn't know who he.
Peter: In my head he was everything I thought I wanted and I later realized it was more physical then anything else.
The Chef: An older man living a young man's life...still makes me smile when I think of him...always have been good times :)
The Oil Man: Ohh this one hurt my ego a lot. I won't lie. There's no point, right? Really liked this guy but again, things happen for a reason. Currently I don't know what it is but I feel I will figure it out one day and hopefully when I do it really won't matter.
All in all each relationship I have mentioned taught me something, whether I wanted to learn it or not.
Love is not about always being in love and happy. Its about going through ups and downs, finding love in the strangest of places, learning about yourself and how much you really can love another human. My love life may not be the best because…. Hello?! I am still single, and I am enjoying my life but I do realize that I want to find the love of MY life and I know I will...soon.
Someone once said... "Someday, someone is going to walk into your life and make you realize why it never worked out with anyone else"...so true.
A couple of weeks ago I was talking to a friend about his wife and how he knew, and what he told me is what I wanted to hear. He said "I saw her and instantly I knew. I knew she was the one for me and I knew I had to make her my wife". He also said he was happy he meet her at work because had he met her at a club he it might not have worked. Yes, they did get married and they are very happy. I guess it is true, a guy really knows when he sees the woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with.
On a running note....I will be running 14 miles alone on Friday morning so if you're interested let me know! ;) Here is a picture of Vane and I running at Van Cortalnd.
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